I thought I was doing pretty good with all this the past few days. I was wrong. Decided to go to my local bar and had someone tell me "hey, word hit of what happened, can i buy you a shot?"
holy fuck that sucked. people are talking about this.... without me. FUCK! that is so fucking painful. especailly after the shots i chose to have after that. i fucking hate this.
on a side note, there is ONE thing in my life that is making this less horrible. i can't really explain what it is, because i don't fully understand what it is right now....but it's making me focus. i hope this continues.
my mellow music for this type of situation hasn't changed since about 1998 or so.. listening to the same mellow "break up" music is rough... but still somehow works. i need something different.
she hasn't called or emailed me at all. she fucking hates me. this isn't exactly what ran through my head saturday morning Sept 1st 2007.
i'm going to bed.
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