so she just came and took the kitty. everything of hers is now gone. i almost lost it completely. today is going to be a very depressing day. scratch that... it IS a very depressing day. tomorrow, i'll start this life with her totally out of my life, but for today i'm putting blankets on the windows and i'm gonna crawl in a corner of my head and stay there.
world, i'll see you tomorrow.
I had a dream about you last night. You were calling me and I couldn't hear you so I had to hang up and call back to get a good connection. I just remembered that right now. Weird. Just know that people are thinking fondly of you even when you don't know it!!! I know you'll get through today Gary, even if you don't!!! Hug on Titan some, that always helps...
ReplyDeleteWhen I see you in person, I am *so* giving you the hugest hug.
ReplyDeleteThere's this old Persian proverb that comes to mind,I'm quite sure you've heard it...."this too shall pass." It means that all things material, regardless of their being positive or negative, are "temporarily" experienced by people. I say this to you now, Gary-this too, shall pass. Even though you hurt like hell today, and the situation is pretty goddam awful right now, I promise you won't feel this way forever. In time, you will heal, you will adjust, you will be ok. Just not today, or any of the immediate days which follow it. As you know, it's gonna be painful awhile :(
OK, now I'm not a spiritual person, and I'm going to go on a limb here and open up a little myself. 2005 was a very, very dark time for me. I experienced huge amounts of loss and personal transition.It was during this time when I ran across this excerpt from a text called "The Prophet" by Kahlil Gibran. I typed it out and carried it with me for a very long time. It totally made sense to my broken heart.
"Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.
Even as the stone of the fruit must break, that its heart may stand in the sun, so must you know pain.
And could you keep your heart in wonder at the daily miracles of your life, your pain would not seem less wondrous than your joy;
And you would accept the seasons of your heart, even as you have always accepted the seasons that pass over your fields.
And you would watch with serenity through the winters of your grief."
Take care of yourself today, friend. I think you're damn awesome.
((hugs))
~B.
I ♥ you, Gary.
ReplyDeleteMonkey
Love you, Gary. My heart breaks for you.
ReplyDelete